HOW TO ASK FOR HELP

REAL STRENGTH ISN'T DOING IT ALL ALONE
- IT'S KNOWING WHEN YOU CAN'T

We get it.
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The idea of asking for help can feel like failure.
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Like admitting defeat.
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Like exposing a weakness you've spent years trying to hide.

But here's the truth: the real power lies in facing that discomfort - and doing it anyway.

Whether you're dealing with a mental health issue, stuck in a toxic relationship, drowning in debt, or simply feeling lost in life - no one should have to carry the weight on their own.

This is your reminder: you don't have to.

No one gets through life alone.

Not without damage. Not without burnout. Not without breaking down.

We've been taught to push it down. To stay strong. To "man up." But all that does is trap us in silence and shame. At
We Are Mentality, we're breaking that cycle. We believe the strongest men are the ones who reach out, even when it's hard. Especially when it's hard.

This isn't about needing saving - it's about getting support. About giving yourself permission to heal, to learn, and to move forward.

WHY ASKING FOR HELP MATTERS

We've all seen what happens when men bottle things up: anxiety, burnout, addictions, relationship breakdowns, emotional shutdown. You can't carry the weight of everything and expect to thrive - or even survive - without support.

Asking for help is not weakness. It's strategy.

It's how you stay in the fight. It's how you learn, grow, and rise above the things holding you back.

Even elite athletes and coaches. Even soldiers rely on their team.

So what makes you think you're meant to do life solo?

WHY IT'S SO DAMN HARD

Let's get into it. Most men don't struggle because they're stubborn - they struggle because they've been trained to believe that silence is strength.

Here are three big reasons asking for help feels so uncomfortable:

1. WE FEAR BEING JUDGED

Whether it's your mates, your family, or even strangers - most of us fear what people will think if they really knew. But guess what? Most of them are struggling too. People aren't judging you; they're often relieved that someone said what they've been feeling.

2. WE DON'T KNOW WHEre TO START

Do you need a mate to vent to? A therapist? A financial advisor? What do you even say? That feeling of confusion alone can be enough to shut it all down. But starting small is better than not starting at all. One text. One call. One honest moment.

3. WE'VE NEVER DONE IT BEFORE

If you've always been the guy who just gets on with it, asking for help will feel unnatural. But everything feels awkward before it becomes powerful. Help is a skill. Learn it - your future self will thank you.

SO...HOW DO YOU ACTUALLY ASK?

Here's the part that matters. You don't need a speech. You don't need to break it down. You don't need a perfect plan.

You just need to say one of the following:

• "I'm not okay right now."
• "I need to talk to someone."
• "I'm struggling and I don't know what to do."
• "I don't need you to fix it, but I need someone to listen."
• "Can we talk? I'm having a rough time."

CHOOSE THE RIGHT PERSON

• Friend or family member: Someone who won't judge or dismiss you.
• Professional support: Doctor, counsellor, or therapist - the people who are trained to actually help.
• Online or anonymous help: If face-to-face is too much, helplines, text services, or support communities can be a great place to start.

And if it's really serious - if you're at breaking point - we will always encourage you to speak with a mental health professional. Doctors, therapists and counsellors exist for a reason.

Don't wait until you've hit the wall.

You're not weak for reaching out. You're wise. You're taking responsibility.

THE FOUR-WORD CHECK-IN THAT CAN SAVE A LIFE

You don't need to be a therapist to make a difference.

Sometimes, all it takes is four words:

"How are you, really?"

That one extra word - "really" - opens the door.

You're not just being polite. You're giving someone permission to drop the mask. To be honest. To feel safe to say what's actually going on.

You never know what someone's carrying around until you ask the right way.

So next time you're checking in with a mate, especially one who seems off or distant, don't overthink it. Just try:

• "How are you, really?"
• "You don't seem yourself - want to talk?"
• "You doing okay, mate?"

IF A MATE OPENS UP TO YOU

So let's say they do open up. What now?

Here's what you don't need to be: a fixer, a counsellor, or some motivational guru. What you do need to be is present, patient, and real.

HERE'S WHAT HELPS:

• Just listen. Don't interrupt. Let them speak without feeling judged.
• Acknowledge it. Say something like "That sounds really tough," or "Thanks for telling me."
• Avoid clichés. Don't say "Just man up," or "Others have it worse." That shuts the door again.
• Follow up. Text the next day. Drop a voice note. Keep the connection going.

IF YOU'RE UNSURE WHAT TO SAY, TRY THIS:

"Mate, I'm not a professional, but I'm here. We can figure this out together."

That one sentence can mean the world.

And if you're worried that what they've said might be serious, gently suggest getting professional help. Offer to go with them, look up a number, or just remind them they don't have to do it alone.

Being there doesn't mean fixing it. It means staying close enough so they don't feel alone.

THE WE ARE MENTALITY PROMISE

We're not experts shouting down at you.
We're men standing with you.

Some of us have been in those dark places. Some of us are still working through them. But together, we can strip away the shame, and finally make asking for help feel normal - not rare.

This platform isn't about us. It's about you. And if this is your first time reaching out - whether it's by reading this, listening to the podcast, or just knowing that you're not alone - we're glad you're here.

WHAT NOW?

• Talk to someone you trust.
• Use the free resources on this site.
• Visit on of the mental health charities on our About Us page.
• Or just take one small step today - any step at all.

Because change doesn't start with a breakdown.

It starts with a choice.

You are not a burden. You are a human being.

And help is not out of reach. It's just a conversation away.