TRAUMA AND CHILDHOOD WOUNDS
"Just because you can’t see the scar, doesn’t mean the wound isn’t there."
⚠️ DISCLAIMER ⚠️
If you believe you may be suffering from trauma, we strongly encourage you to speak with a qualified professional - a therapist, psychologist, or just your doctor. Trauma is complex and deeply personal, and no online article can replace the care and guidance of a trained expert.
What you are told in those professional settings always takes precedence over the information on this page. We’re not here to diagnose or fix - just to offer insight, reassurance, and a starting point.
WHY THIS MATTERS
Trauma isn’t always dramatic. It’s not always violence, abandonment, or obvious abuse.
Sometimes, it’s a thousand moments where you felt ignored, unloved, shamed, or forced to grow up too fast. Childhood wounds have a nasty way of showing up later - in how we trust, how we react, how we numb ourselves, and how we sabotage things we actually want.
This page isn’t here to diagnose you.
It’s here to say: if something doesn’t feel right, you’re not overthinking it.
And you’re not weak for wanting answers.
WHAT YOU'LL FIND ON THIS PAGE
WHAT TRAUMA REALLY MEANS
Trauma isn’t just about what happened. It’s about what happened inside you.
It’s the emotional impact of something that overwhelmed your ability to cope or made you feel unsafe - physically or emotionally. That could be anything from neglect, constant criticism, emotional coldness, to chaotic or unsafe home environments.
Types of trauma men often overlook:
- Being “parentified” - forced to be the adult too early
- Emotional neglect - not being seen, heard, or comforted
- Growing up around addiction, mental illness, or violence
- Never being allowed to express emotion or cry
- Always being told to "man up" or "get on with it"
SIGNS YOU MIGHT BE CARRYING CHILDHOOD WOUNDS
Many men minimise their experiences, especially if there was no clear "event."
But these subtle signs often point to unresolved trauma:
- Feeling emotionally numb or disconnected
- Trouble trusting others or opening up
- Intense fear of failure or rejection
- Explosive anger or emotional shutdowns
- Sabotaging relationships or success
- Feeling like you're never "enough", no matter what you achieve
If these hit close to home, it doesn’t mean you’re broken - it means your body and mind are protecting you the best way they know how.
HOW IT SHOWS UP IN ADULT LIFE
Unhealed wounds have a habit of leaking out.
They show up in relationships - in the way you push people away before they can hurt you, or cling tightly for fear of being abandoned.
They show up in work - in your drive for success, perfectionism, or fear of being exposed as a fraud.
They show up in coping - through drinking, porn, overworking, or shutting down altogether.
And they show up in silence - in the voice that tells you “don’t talk about this,” or “you should be over this by now.”
FIRST STEPS TOWARDS HEALING
You don’t need to unpack it all at once. But here are a few ways to begin:
1. NAME IT
Give the feeling a name. Guilt. Shame. Loneliness. Rage. Whatever it is - name it so it doesn’t own you.
2. know it's not your fault
You didn’t choose the circumstances that shaped you. But you can choose what you do next.
3. START TALKING
To a therapist. A support group. A mate who listens without judgement. Talking gives pain somewhere to go.
4. LEARN TO FEEL AGAIN
If you’ve been emotionally numb for years, even basic feelings might be overwhelming. That’s okay. Start small.
5. FOCUS ON SAFETY AND SELF-TRUST
Healing isn’t about reliving the past - it’s about feeling safe in the present. Practice routines, rituals, and relationships that ground you.
RECOMMENDED READING
These books offer a deeper dive into trauma and recovery:
YOUTUBE RESOURCES
Here are some powerful, trustworthy videos that break things down further:
WHERE TO GET SUPPORT:
You are not alone, and you don’t have to carry this forever.

CALM (Campaign Against Living Miserably)Support for men facing depression, anxiety, or suicidal thoughts.
📞 Helpline: 0800 58 58 58 (5pm - Midnight, 365 days)
🌐
www.thecalmzone.net 
MIND - For better Mental HealthInformation and support for anyone experiencing a mental health problem
📞 Infoline: 0300 123 3393 (9am - 6pm, Mon-Fri)
📧 Email: info@mind.org.uk
🌐
www.mind.org.uk 
StrongMenSupport for men dealing with grief and bereavement.
🌐
www.strongmen.org.uk 
SamaritansA free, 24/7 listening service for anyone in emotional distress or despair
📞 Helpline: 116 123 (UK and Ireland)
📧 Email: jo@samaritans.org
🌐
www.samaritans.org 
Respect Men's Advice LineConfidential support for men experiencing domestic abuse.
📞 Helpline: 0808 801 0327 (Mon-Fri, 10am - 5pm)
📧 Email: info@mensadviceline.org.uk
🌐
www.mensadviceline.org.uk FINAL WORDS
If any part of this page hit something in you - take it seriously.
You’re not being dramatic. You’re not weak. And you’re certainly not alone.
There’s no timeline for healing, and no shame in needing help.
If anything, facing your past is one of the strongest things a man can do.